Jean, Dead???
by eight ball
Summary: this is a product of my bordem. Jean perished, but Scott wont except it. Just read it. please R


A/N: This is the result of watching to much Shaun Micallef. This was written by me without my sister, so it might be a bit different from our previous two stories, but its still pretty much pointless crap where the characters act weirder than normal, but this time its pointless crap where the characters act weirder than normal inspired by Shaun Micallef, who might I add is my new muse.  
  
Disclaimer: Don't own any of 'em  
  
Jean, dead???  
  
8 ball   
  
"NOOOOO" Cyclops screamed as he saw Jean fall to the ground, but she was already dead by the time he got to her. Their was sadness in the air as the X men flew home in the blackbird, everyone was upset except for Cyclops who seemed like nothing had happened, and Beast was the first to notice this. "Um Scott, not meaning to be a nuisance, but shouldn't you be the one mourning Jean's death more than any of us?" asked Beast. "Why should I be upset, she's just going to come back you know and this time I'm not gonna get with her clone, am I Jeanie" he said while lifting up the dead X man's head. "You do realise that the petite is dead, don't you?" Scott just glared at Gambit. "Don't you worry, she's going to spring back to life any time soon, so until then as your team leader I command you to treat her just as if she was alive." "Classic denial" whispered Beast to Storm. "I heard that," yelled Scott "you'll be sorry" and with that he blew off Beast's arm. "Hey" screamed Beast while attaching another mechanical arm, which he just happened to have lying around. When the blackbird landed, all the X men got off the jet leaving Scott to lug jeans body with him. "Professor Xavier, I should inform you that Cyclops insists that Jean is going to come back to life soon, and anyone who suggests otherwise will have their arm or any other major limb taken off by his optical blast" "Thankyou Storm, like I didn't already know that, I am psychic remember. The best thing to do is to just go along with it or try to ignore it"  
  
Later that night when everyone was eating dinner: "Yum, this is so nice. Who was cooking tonight?" asked Jubilee "Me and Jean did" said Scott. Everyone one stopped chewing and stared at Scott and the dead carcass that was attracting flies. Scott didn't notice and continued eating soup, when he suddenly stopped, dug his hand into the soup, pulled up something and squealed with delight "Oh look Jeanie, I found your finger, I was wondering where that had gotten to. Now eat up, we cant let you have malnutrition now can we" everyone started to gag Storm even vomited (she didn't want any type of unhealthy food in her system). Everyone left the table, except Wolverine who was picking up his plate and went up to his room; no fingers were going to ruin his steak.  
  
One month later  
  
"Scott its time I think we had a talk, and yes Jean can come to. Ok it's been about a month since, well, Jean was killed, and you've been dragging her body practically everywhere. The smell has been making everyone sick, even finding some of Jeans limbs in places has really made the team unwell, and I know she has been good in some battles with distracting the enemy and being hurled at them. But its time to, um..." "What are you saying Professor?" "Well have you thought about getting her cremated? I mean she'd be a lot more portable, and you could put her in a bag, the smell won't affect anyone, and Wolverine wont try and eat her when he turns feral. What do you think? "Well I suppose, I am the team leader and I should be thinking more of other people feelings. Ok" "Great, take her down to Beast, and he'll sort out the rest"  
  
The End - but there is an epilogue (he he I like having epilogue's it make the story seem better)  
  
Epilogue After the cremation Scott found himself a very stylish carry back to put Jean's ashes in, even though the bag made him look extremely gay, he didn't mind. One day when Scott was taking Jean on her daily morning walk, he accidentally dropped the bag and a gust of wind took Jean's ashes away. Completely assured that this was the time for Jean to make her comeback, and her ashes to twirl up into the shape of her body, he did nothing to stop the ashes from blowing away. But to no avail, the ashes blew away and were inhaled by a young teenage boy. But that can't be the end you say, well its not. See the ashes were Jean's particle essence, and Jean inhabited the young boy, so Scott was very happy that he had Jean back, although many people thought it strange how Scott and this young boy (Jean) were acting together, so Scott was labelled a strange sicko. But that is not the end either, because one day Cyclops was watching a recently discovered video of him being born only to find out that he was a girl. How could he of not known he was a girl and think he was a guy, you ask, well I'll leave that up to you to decided. Anyway in conclusion to my strange and twisted story, Jean, who is really in a guys body is married to Scott, who IS a girl and they live happily ever after, and Scott doesn't have to worry about Logan taking his girl (boy) because Logan just isn't that sick to be attracted to a young male.  
  
Now it's the end!! 


End file.
